Flawed Men Make Legends

And why good men are forgotten

Legends are flawed because, of course, we’re all flawed. It can be a lonely affair looking within, so we celebrate those who air their flaws in the open instead, as if we’re celebrating ourselves—because we are.

When David Bowie died, someone Tweeted: I’m not mourning because I knew him, I’m mourning because he helped me know myself. That’s what legends do. They often live our demons for us. And like a full moon reflecting the sun back into our souls, sometimes they give us just enough light to see a way through.

For an act like this, fame alone is insufficient. This is about recognition, about recognizing a part of ourselves in someone else. This is what makes legends.

It’s Nelson Mandela’s long wait for freedom. It’s Susan B. Anthony’s fight for equality. It’s Bowie’s enduring commitment to expressing his true self. These struggles are tied together with that unbreakable thread called the human condition, which has a stitch in each of us.

Yet we have a choice in what we see in others, in these legends. Some become idols. Others live in infamy. The difference is what we see in ourselves when we look at them—it’s a matter of love and fear. Do we see a part of ourselves we’d like to love, or something we’re scared of?

The most persuasive force out there is someone who says with enough conviction “it’s all going to be okay.” When we become fearful of the unknown, some people give up all the love inside themselves to quiet the discomfort, hoping just to feel good again.

This is why good men are forgotten. Overshadowed by those to whom they’ve outsourced their love and fear, those who will use this power in whichever way they choose—good or otherwise—and become legends for it.

We each have a choice to make. Will we hold onto our own goodness and put it where we want it, or will we give it up for the sake of some legend with his own agenda?

Martin Luther King famously wrote: Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.

Here’s to choosing love.

-Martin

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